The post with no title

dont really know why but just felt compelled to blog. My previous blogs havent really been that uplifting have they? And if I'm totally honest (and I can be because the chances that many people will read this are small) I dont really feel that uplifting today.

Tonight was worship practice....again if I'm honest I really struggle with worshpi practice and often come away with a heavy heart. Why should it be this way? Ive considered chucking it all in more than once and the reasons are as much to do with my own failings as any other issues I have. Its come to my notice that so many problems are caused in this world because we just cannot follow the commandment to love one another....why is this so hard? Its because it means denying ourselves and putting the needs of others first. Its because sometimes we have to admit we are wrong and risk feeling small and inferior. Its because well as humans we are naturally selfish and its easier to do what satisfies us than brings comfort to someone else. Its because sometimes we have to back down even when we are right and its because its easier to give in to gossip and feel part of the crowd than to move away and refuse to run someone down - remember its not enough to sit there and listen quietly!

I heard recently of a preacher whose entire sermon for several months week in week out was "love one another" it apoparently had the backs of the eldership up because they weren't paying him to preach for 3 seconds a week yet those 3 words had such an impact, they caused people to turn to others in the church and ask how they could love them today, it caused them to knock on doors and ask how they could love them, it caused members of the community to call up the church and ask is this the church that is willing to help me? How amazing is that? Surely if we are minding our hearts and asking god to deal with our self issues and concentrating on what we can do to love others rather than on what irritates us then the world would be a much better place and maybe just maybe we wouldnt be leaving church with a heavy heart.

Sorry to make my come back so deep but sometimes this is the only place I can say how I feel.

Love ya x